Are you a football fanatic hungry for hilarious jokes? Look no further! Endzone Humor: 200+ Sidesplitting Football Jokes & Puns serves up over 200 pun-tastic quips and witty wordplay about America’s favorite sport. Prepare to chuckle your way through the season with this assortment.
Need a good laugh to go along with your football fandom? Fumbling for hilarious jokes that’ll really move the chains? This book’s a touchdown of comedic genius. Get ready to chuckle with Endzone Humor; 200+ Hilarious Football Jokes & Puns.
These puns are so sharp and funny you won’t be able to resist. Nothing can stop these jokes, not a linebacker breaking through the offensive line.
Touchdown Entertainment: Football Puns and Hilarious Jokes Our Top Editor’s Plays!
1. Why did the football coach go to the bank? To get his quarter back!
2. Why couldn’t the football player read the defensive line? The words kept getting sacked!
3. I went to a football camp once, but I didn’t fully appreciate the ground rules.
4. A soccer ball knocked on the door of a football. The football shouted “Go ahead and kick it!”
5. Why did the football player go to the movies? To watch the linebackers!
6. What kind of ball doesn’t need air? A soccer ball…duh!
7. Why did the lineman go to the doctor? He had an ingrown tackle!
8. Why couldn’t the football player climb the hill? He didn’t have enough dri-linemen!
9. Why was the yardstick allowed on the football field? For play calibrations!
10. What do you call a mom who can outrun her son’s football coach? A step-ahead.
11. Why did the chicken help put air in the football? She was an outstanding wing!
12. Where do baby footballs come from? Baltimore!
13. Why was the stadium so hot after the game? Because there was so much fan!
14. I tried to catch the pass, but it de-fendered off my hands.
15. Why didn’t the defensive end make the team? His blind-side was atrocious!
16. Did you hear about the forgetful football player? He kept having touchdowns!
17. Why did the football player bring a comb to the game? For personal fouls!
18. Why couldn’t the clumsy football player score? He kept tripping over his feet!
19. What kind of exercise do football players hate most? Drake stretches!
20. Why did the football player quit? He wanted to try his hand at soccer instide.
21. Why was the football hired at the diner? He was great at serving up quarterbacks!
22. Why shouldn’t you keep milk in the football? Because it’ll get scored!
23. What kind of car does a football drive? A sports-utility-vehicle!
24. What do you call a football player who puts stuff together? A tackle!
25. What do you call a football who causes mayhem wherever he goes? Bane!
Recommended Post: Winter Warmth: 200+ Hilarious Snow Puns to Cozy Up With
Kick Off the Laughs: Hilarious One-Liner Puns About Football:
1. Quarterbacks make great dough! They know how to raise some dough!
2. Why do footballs hate the holidays? They get stuffed and kicked around!
3. What do you call a clueless football player? A running back!
4. A football team is called a squad because they spend a lot of dough.
5. Why did the football player go to the baseball game? To watch the pitcher!
6. Why was the football player good at gym? He was solid at catching a fly!
7. What kind of balls never get scored on? Baseballs!
8. Want to hear a pizza joke? Never mind, it’s too cheesy!
9. Did you hear about the destructive football? It absolutely wrecked the game!
10. What do you call a boiling football player? A hot broiler!
11. Why was the football sent to jail? For beating the mascot!
12. A football is just an eccentric circle.
13. Football fans are just really big airbags!
14. What has more letters than the alphabet? A football field!
15. Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it’s too cheesy!
16. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up!
17. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity…It’s impossible to put down!
18. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
19. What do you call a dog that does magic tricks? A labracadabrador!
20. Why can’t a bicycle stand up by itself? It’s two-tired!
21. What gets torn, burnt, and smashed at a football game? The rulebook!
22. You know what they say about affordable stadium food… Cheap concessions!
23. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up!
24. Defensive players sure are good at de-fending off attackers!
25. Why didn’t the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe
Kick Some Laughs: QnA Jokes & Puns about ‘Soccer’ Fundamentals!
1. Q: Why was the soccer player arrested?
A: For kicking a ball to Venus!
2. Q: Why do soccer players make terrible dancers?
A: They have two left feet!
3. Q: What kind of ball won’t bounce?
A: A dead one!
4. Q: Why did the soccer player go to the baseball game?
A: To learn the ground rules!
5. Q: Why can’t a soccer team play in the rain?
A: They might drown in the field positions!
6. Q: Why did the soccer ball go to the psychiatrist?
A: It had way too many kick-offs!
7. Q: Why don’t soccer balls ever get haircuts?
A: They dread split ends!
8. Q: What do you call a fashionable soccer ball?
A: A kick-chic!
9. Q: Why did the soccer player take a shower?
A: To get a head start!
10. Q: What stops a soccer game from starting?
A: The kickoff!
11. Q: Why can’t you take a soccer ball on a plane?
A: They make terrible traveling companions!
12. Q: What do you call a soccer referee with a big chest?
A: An extra chested official!
13. Q: What do you call a soccer ball that tells lots of lies?
A: A fibball!
14. Q: What do you call a soccer player who loses their pie?
A: A wasteful crust!
15. Q: Why did the soccer player fail their spelling test?
A: They kept missing the vowels!
16. Q: What do you call a soccer ball that is always hungry?
A: A munchin’ ball!
17. Q: Why shouldn’t you keep glass balls in your soccer bag?
A: They’ll get smashed!
18. Q: Why couldn’t the soccer ball dance?
A: It had two left feet!
19. Q: What kind of ball never gets kicked?
A: A meatball!
20. Q: Why did the referee get arrested?
A: For blowing the whistle on the game!
21. Q: What do hungry soccer balls get?
A: The munchies!
22. Q: Why did the soccer player go to the eye doctor?
A: They couldn’t see the goal!
23. Q: What do you get when you cross a soccer ball with a ghost?
A: A booooooooouncy ball!
24. Q: Why shouldn’t you bring a clock to a soccer game?
A: It’ll run down the field!
25. Q: What do soccer players like to put on their hot dogs?
A: Mustard!
Kickin’ It with Some Wise & Witty Football Phrases
1. The best offense is a good defensive line.
2. If you can’t take the heat, get off the gridiron.
3. Champions are made in the off-season.
4. Leave it all on the field.
5. No snowflake ever fell in the right place.
6. Quitting is never an option.
7. Success is prepared ability meeting opportunity.
8. Winning isn’t everything, but making the effort is.
9. The road to victory doesn’t allow for hitchhikers.
10. You’ll never regret the games you showed up for.
11. Quality performance starts with a positive attitude.
12. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
13. Champions keep playing until they get it right.
14. Hard work beats talent when talent fails to work hard.
15. Today’s progress was yesterday’s plan.
16. To get what you’ve never had, do what you’ve never done.
17. Excellence is not a singular act but a habit.
18. Hustlers don’t need motivational quotes.
19. To be a champion, you have to believe in something.
20. Win or learn, there is no lose.
21. Greatness is not found by walking the easy path.
22. The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.
23. Hard work and dedication make dreams realities.
24. Talk is cheap. Actions are invaluable.
25. Confidence comes from discipline and training.
Recommended Post: 200+ Spooky Ghost Puns: That Will Have You Cackling Like a Witch
Kick Off Your Laughter with these Dad Jokes about ‘Football’s Most Hilarious Fumbles!’
1. Why did the football player go to the barbecue joint? For the full rack!
2. Why couldn’t the football player climb the hill? He didn’t have enough dri-linemen!
3. What do you call a pig that does ballet? A pliéééé-baque!
4. Why didn’t the football get any sleep? Because it was amarched all night!
5. I used to hate football puns…but then they grew on me!
6. Why did the football player take their pet to the game? To let it watch the fur-mations!
7. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
8. Why did the football bring pencils to the big game? For field notes!
9. A courtroom is just a really fancy sandbox for lawyers!
10. Why was the stadium hot after the game? Because of all the fans!
11. I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed super surprised!
12. Why didn’t the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe!
13. What kind of coffee was served at the football stadium? A filter!
14. How do you follow Will Smith in the snow? You follow the fresh prints!
15. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now!
16. Why was the baseball player such a great comedian? Because he knew how to get a hit!
17. What do you call a fish wearing a crown? A sovereign!
18. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
19. Why can’t you trust atoms? They make up everything!
20. What do you call a boiled candy pumpkin? A mush-melon!
21. What do you get when you cross a bridge with a pie? A cross-ant!
22. Why did the kid throw the clock out the window? To see time fly!
23. What did the bald man exclaim after getting a comb stuck in his hair? Aw, nuts!
24. The world turtle moves at a punderful pace!
25. Whenever the snail went to a party, he always brought his own house!
Kicking Puns and Laughing Goals: Hilarious Spoonerisms about Football
1. A bungle of fays for the flay payers!
2. The deam tocked their tirts.
3. Stopping the rall is a beal hore.
4. The nard-liney bays made some tSocking cackes.
5. Chunder and tittering at the tame gull.
6. The rEal parm of a tootball fanner.
7. Quite the kancy dip from the narter-back!
8. Those hacky tunts were quite the reefer’s nuzzle.
9. The wames and gimes of loorball.
10. Tonvenient corm for the deatch.
11. Gutting a rend in the fefensive dine.
12. What an ircle of excels!
13. A ratty cess for the pore kends!
14. The eam’s tine was quite luckey.
15. The rammer’s pit was a beeze!
16. We’ll ree the same gain!
17. Some inking drinkers for the pains!
18. That was a tosser of a numb!
19. The letch’s bawls were in tine!
20. Heck it up to the tipe line!
21. Cack of Jell for the pell bairs!
22. Some lathers on the feazing!
23. The norld of wunder!
24. Pray and blay, the tay’s gan!
25. The meam trade for the tan rame!
2 for 1 Score: Hilarious Double Entendres about Football You Can’t Miss!
1. Did you see that tight end? What an asset!
2. The coach really inspected those receivers.
3. That running back has great hands.
4. They’re going to pound it in the hole.
5. Wow, what a nickel package!
6. Those offensive guards are huge!
7. The QB took it deep…all the way!
8. That linebacker is a real monster.
9. The center really knows how to snap.
10. He sacked the quarterback hard.
11. Talk about penetrating the line!
12. What a stud tight end!
13. The receivers ran some long, hard routes.
14. The running game was explosive today.
15. They really stuffed it in the end zone.
16. Those defensive backs are physical.
17. The coach loves utilizing man coverage.
18. What great ball protection by the runner!
19. Did you see how the QB took it in the backfield?
20. The defense gave that receiver a beating.
21. Wait till you see their blitz packages!
22. Those corners are lockdown all day.
23. The QB couldn’t handle that outside rush.
24. He was wide open in the flat.
25. That shotgun snap went right through his legs!
Kicking it Up a Notch: Hilarious Recursive Puns about the Gridiron Game!
1. A pun about puns that scores big on the pun-turf!
2. This kick of witty kicks really boots the fun up a notch!
3. Puns so punny, they’re the puntastic pundit of punditry!
4. An unstoppable blitz of clever quips blitzing the gridiron of gags!
5. These jokes joke about joking hilariously about the game we laugh and joke about!
6. Humorous humor humoring the humorous with puns so funny they’re…punny!
7. A quip of quips quipping some rapid-fire quips to quicken your wit!
8. The comedic comedy of puns pun-ishing pun after pun for non-stop pun-ishment!
9. Gags so witty and side-splitting, they’ll leave you pun-dering their underfur play!
10. Footballs of fun roll out an endless field’s worth of knee-slapping pun fields!
11. Pun-tastic puns pun-ching the pun out of the pun-iverse’s pun supply!
12. Puns about punny stuff punning on puns about punnier puns!
13. A pun-filled pun-avore’s pun-tasia of puns punbelievably pun-tounding punxpectations!
14. Punsters gonna pun puns, and these puns’ puns are the puniest of the punning punch!
15. Puns playing the pun-pun-pun music that’ll have you pun-dering in punderment!
16. Punapalooza punchalicious pun-tacular puncentric puns gone pun-demonium!
17. Pun blitzkrieg of pun-tastic pun-titude bringing explosive pun-tastic action!
18. The pun-tastic punapocalypse you’ve been pun-ticipating is pun-derway!
19. Lay a punder-pounding pun poundage of hit-puns in the pun pun pun zone!
20. These punscores are the stuff of punstuction, constructing puns stunningly!
21. If puns could punt, these punned punts would be punting punbrokeably!
22. The pun doesn’t stop with these punceptional pun-pioneers punting out pun-packed punderdry!
23. Cross-train with pun-tastic puncrossfitness as these puns puncross the pun-ish line!
24. Gridiron gags so punshakable, you’ll be shaking from the pun-concussive impact!
25. Puns with such punbelievable punpuntuationability, you’ll enpunchiate with punpunctuated glee!
Kick-Off with Laughter: Hilarious Tom Swifties about Football!
1. I’ll throw a perfect spiral,” the quarterback said circularly.
2. “That was an illegal motion penalty,” the referee said off-sides.
3. “We need to run more sweeps,” the coach said sweepingly.
4. “Time for some misdirection plays,” the quarterback said deceptively.
5. “The defense is in a 3-4 scheme,” the linebacker said formidably.
6. “We should have gone for it on 4th down,” the quarterback grumbled forcefully.
7. “The crowd is so loud,” the receiver said eardrum-shatteringly.
8. “I’m getting double-teamed,” the tight end said doubly.
9. “Let’s hurry up and spike the ball,” the QB said quickly.
10. “We need to establish the run game,” the fullback said groundedly.
11. “I’m calling an audible at the line,” the QB shouted loudly.
12. “Our offensive line dominates,” the guard said unbudgingly.
13. “That hit gave me whiplash,” the safety said neck-wrenchingly.
14. “I got leveled on that play,” the running back said flatly.
15. “I dropped another pass,” the receiver said butterfingers.
16. “That juke move was sick!” the cornerback said zig-zaggingly.
17. “Lets pick up the pace ” the quarterback exclaimed excitedly.
18. “We should be more cautious with our commitments ” the linebacker remarked casually.
19. “The shotgun snap hit me in the facemask,” the QB said eye-pokingly.
20. “It’s time for some razzle-dazzle,” the coach said razzle-dazzlingly.
21. “That touchdown celebration was over the top,” the ref said excessively.
22. “This press coverage is stifling,” the receiver said suffocatingly.
23. “We’re down by a field goal,” the kicker said three-pointedly.
24. “Run it up the gut,” the fullback said stubbornly.
25. “We won the coin toss,” the captain said flippantly.
Score Big Laughs with These Knock-Knock Football Jokes!
1. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Interrupting linebacker.
Interrupting lineback…BLITZZZZZ!
2. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Hike.
Hike who?
Hike the ball to the open receiver!
3. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Dutch.
Dutch who?
Dutch the most amazing touchdown dance!
4. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Offsides.
Offsides who?
Offsides doesn’t matter, it’s a penalty!
5. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Fumble.
Fumble who?
Fumble the snap and lose possession!
6. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Blitz.
Blitz who?
No time to answer, the blitz is coming!
7. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Cobb.
Cobb who?
Cobb your enthusiasm, we haven’t scored yet!
8. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don’t boo, we’re just terrible today!
9. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive-bodied touchdown celebration!
10. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Hugo.
Hugo who?
Hugo crazy if you think we’ll win this game!
11. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Tank.
Tank who?
Tank goodness we signed that huge defensive lineman!
12. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Catch.
Catch who?
Catch this perfect spiral for a touchdown!
13. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Flea.
Flea who?
Flea-flicker play for a deep bomb!
14. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Bert.
Bert who?
Bert the other team is beating us badly.
15. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Onsides.
Onsides who?
Onsides kick to try and get the ball back!
16. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Punt.
Punt who?
Punt the ball away on 4th down.
17. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Injure.
Injure who?
Injure-time we run the hurry-up offense!
18. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ida.
Ida who?
Ida-lly we could get our offense going.
19. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Oops.
Oops who?
Oops, I dropped the wide open pass!
20. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Omar.
Omar who?
Omar goodness, did you see that bone-crushing hit?!
21. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Benny.
Benny who?
Benny-fensive holding call on that play?
22. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Toodaloo.
Toodaloo who?
Toodaloo many turnovers to win today!
23. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Iva.
Iva who?
Iva sinking feeling we’re going to lose.
24. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Kenny.
Kenny who?
Kenny-body stop our run game?
25. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh who?
looks like the quarterback made a mistake with that interception returned for a touchdown!
Conclusion
Endzone Humor is a hilarious book. The book contains more than 200 jokes and puns related to football that are guaranteed to bring a smile to your face.They are perfect for any football fan.The puns are very clever and witty. They use wordplay about football players, games, and rules.
Many of the jokes in the collection are simple enough for children to grasp. Both grown ups and kids alike will find pleasure in these anecdotes. Whether you skim through a handful of jokes or delve into the book you’re sure to be amused.
Endzone Humor is great to read before or after football games. Any fan of football would find it truly delightful. Get this book for nonstop laughs.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does this book cover?
It contains a collection of jokes and wordplay centered around football. It features, than 200 jokes related to the game.
Who would enjoy reading this book?
This book is ideal for anyone passionate about football. Both children and adults will find delight in the humor presented in the jokes.
Are the jokes easy to understand?
Yes, most jokes use simple wordplay that anyone can understand. But some are very clever too.
When should I read this book?
You can read it anytime for laughs! It’s fun before/after football games too.
Lila Ravenwoo I am really knows her stuff when it comes to puns. I have been doing it for four years now! I am super good at playing around with words to make funny and clever jokes. Whether I have writing or talking, I am always finds a way to make people laugh with her puns. Everyone who knows her thinks she’s awesome at it.
